Random Snapthoughts

Well, you can all stop worrying about me: the repair guys came, spent about four hours plodding in and out of my house carrying various sizes of drywall, stinking up the place with paint, and blocking my bathroom. It's a darn good thing they didn't come when I was pregnant. Bucket was pretty good through it all, in part because she spent most of it outside. She loves being outdoors, which is tragic because we live in Utah, and even if she could stand the cold, her mama is a California girl and can't. To me, 75 degrees is cold. And oh look, the average high temp for where we live is BELOW 75 for eight months of the year. Yes, that is the average HIGH temperature, as in the highest point it hits sometime during the day, meaning the rest of the day is usually a lot colder.

Napoleon wonders why I don't want to live in Utah.

What was I talking about again? Oh yes, repairs. It looks like it's all done, and ok.

My folks are coming into town this weekend, for a family reunion and Bucket's blessing. It will be neat to have so many of us here for her blessing. Fun, but stressful. Does anyone else get stressed out when family comes to town? I can't really find a good reason for it. We have a little apartment, so we don't have to host everyone, although we've had people stay with us several times. Dad usually takes us out to eat somewhere nice, which is a fun treat. Nobody in my family is a compulsive liar, overtly manipulative, unbelievable obnoxious, or otherwise really difficult (unless it's me, I guess!). I think we're all pretty fun to be around, so I'm not sure why I always get stressed out when we're all together. I'm wondering if it's because I feel like I have to prove myself, that I'm all grown up now and not the silly little girl I used to be. That's hard, because I get stressed and therefore overly sensitive and more apt to cry when I hear something that I perceive as criticism, which makes me feel immature . . .

I still find it hard to believe that they let somebody like me just walk out of the hospital with a brand new baby. Okay, technically they don't, because they made me sit in a wheelchair, but that's not the point.

We're taking Bucket to get some photos taken today, by a friend of mine who wants some baby pictures as examples for her photography business. I sure hope Bucket has been saving up all her good behavior for Heidi, because she sure hasn't been wasting it on me.

I remember asking my mom, when I was in high school or thereabouts, "What if you love your kids, but you just don't like one of them?" Her answer, which I still have to chew on every so often, was "Then you need to repent."